How to wrap a Christmas Present

Six steps: elegant instructions for wrapping an elegant present and preserving peace in the home:

1. Prepare the wrapping surface: the dining table:
1a. Move the pile of borrowed books and a Christmas table decoration to a chair
1b. Move the unopened boxes of Christmas cards (to be opened, signed, addressed, and mailed next year?) and another decoration to another chair.
1c. Ribbon-hang the received Christmas cards:
1c(1). Go to the garage for hammer, three brads, and the step stool.
1c(2). If not already in hand, get the three red ribbons. If already in hand, go to 1c(3).
1c(3). Gently tap the ribbon into the pillar, preferably into last year's hole.
1c(4). Return hammer and step stool.
1c(5). Go to office for stapler.
1c(6). Staple cards to ribbons.
1c(7). Return stapler. If you're thinking ahead, get the scotch tape.
1c(8). Recycle envelopes, but save the return addresses if people have moved.
1c(9). While saving addresses, respond to sleeping-flailing-husband's dumping entire mug of mocha in the living room. (Give thanks that it is now hardwood and not carpet; otherwise go through the carpet cleaner exercise.) For brevity, the clean-up steps are not detailed here.
1d. Move other miscellaneous paper, pens, and reading glasses to nook table.
2. Re-warm tea.
3. Stop to blog on how to wrap a present.
4. Take a Tylenol for headache if needed.
5. Remember the cleaning lady is coming; move the extra Christmas boxes to the spare room.
6. Size paper, wrap, tape, label.

Now how easy is that?!? Ready to wrap a second gift. After a nap perhaps.

20 questions

Brooke said I 'had' to do this.

Words you always misspell typing: I have to watch that I get "manager" rather than "manger," but it's really because that second "a" is taxing the weakest finger (weak hand pinkie, poor thing.)

Words you don't know how to spell: If you throw an uncommon word at me, I might blow it, but otherwise not a problem.

Things that really annoy you: Self-centered people -- really suck the life out of me.

What's that meal you can always eat over and over again? None. I'm fine with leftovers, don't get me wrong. But the third night of something is really pushing it.

Do you brush your teeth at night? Yup, floss too!

Dumbest movie ever: Me and Irene was weird-dumb. Pulp Fiction (I know some people like it) was bad enough that we only watched 30 minutes or less.

What's a song that you would be embarrassed to admit you really like? Embarrassed, no. But you could try to rib me about "Bare Necessities" from the Jungle Book!

Are you capable of eating an entire bag of candy in one sitting and not feeling THAT sick? No, assuming you're talking about a multi-pack like a pound of mini-Snickers. But a regular serving size bag of Peanut M&M's - sure I could do that.

Do you love sea food? Yes, though getting restaurants to get the salt just right can be a challenge.

When you fix meat, are you anal about what you've touched, and sanitize a lot? Yes. I turn the kitchen tap on first because I know I'm going to want hot water in a minute.

Do you put your leftovers in the fridge after dinner in fear of it spoiling or can you wait? After dinner, of course.

Do you use a sponge or rag to wipe your counters? Depends. If it's related to wiping up meat juices, I'll get a paper towel so I can toss it.

What's your favorite Holiday? Does Saturday count ? ; )

What's your favorite pie? Hmm, apple, pumpkin, very good. But marionberry is da' man!

What's your favorite candy bar? Used to be Snickers. Not so much candy bars these days, but a charity selling See's dark chocolate with almonds can sucker me in.

When you pick something up at the store and change your mind, do you put it away? Yes. But I seldom pick up something that wasn't planned for, so I'm not changing my mind.

Do you like raisins in your Cinnamon rolls? Yes. But I prefer them un-raisined. And I really prefer them unfrosted.

Do you shower every day? Every single morning. I don't feel awake until I've showered.

Are your dreams scary? No, though I don't remember them much.

Do you like scary movies? Not my favorite. Mysteries yes, but I think that's different.

Do you like roller coasters? So-so. Brooke made us be in the first car of on that went straight up, then around a loop the other direction and stopped for a moment -- we were facing straight down, with nothing between us and the ground (some 40 feet down?)

Do you have a fear of needles? I'm okay, but still best if I don't watch the stick. And remember to breath.

What's your guilty pleasure TV show? I don't think "Bones" qualifies as guilty pleasure.

What is something you're really stuck up about? I have the cutest, happiest, baby granddaughter.

When you're at a restaurant, can you ask questions about the food? Yes.

Are you a lake or a river person? Ocean. Puget Sound and Canadian Gulf Island passages. Oh, and British Virgin Islands. And Hawaiian Pacific.

Are you a good swimmer? Just enough that I could stay alive for a long time.

Do you like to camp? Used to. It's been a long time since we've really roughed it.

Do you like rodents? Isn't the definition of rodent something like "the weed of mammals, nobody likes, and everyone wants to get rid of?"

Are you afraid of spiders? No. They get smooshed when I see them, but not because I'm afraid.

If you could be an amazing singer or dancer, which would you be? Singer.

ROW80 (round of words)

julierow80.blogspot.com At Brooke's urging, I'm picking up writing again.

Supreme Being

Forgot to post last week that I discovered there is a Supreme Being. Remember my story about brussels sprouts ("b.s.")? http://juliebike.blogspot.com/2009/12/brussels-sprouts.html

Short version: I don't like 'em!

Ben asked me to plant some "b.s". a few months ago, and Mike likes them too, so for my guys I gave up some garden space, planting six starts. This spring/summer was very odd weather, so I kept waiting for the stems to shoot up (the "b.s." grow around a stem, if you didn't know). Waiting, and waiting, and I thought maybe it just won't happen because the weather messed up everything. The plant leaves, however, were getting HUGE.

Last week I discovered they are getting cabbage heads, not "b.s."

There is a Supreme Being after all!

Brat bum

Kid (early teens) at the bus stop: "Do either of you have money so I can ride up to 99th in Hazel Dell?" I offer him a single-trip ticket. "Uh, no, I can't take your pass. I mean, I need the cash."

Uh-hmm...

N8 and Kylea going nose to nose

Nate says: "When you are older, you will ignore the boys."

K thinks: "I'm going to eat your nose!"

B3 says it's just an Eskimo kiss.

Hey, something bike related!

You would think that with a blog "Julie Bike" there might be something bike related at least once in a while.

Your wait has ended!

[Warning: when I told my co-worker, Melissa, about this, I thought she was going to pee her pants.]

Last Thursday I biked to work. There's a whole routine I have to go through the night before so I can just roll out of bed, brush my teeth, pull on the bike clothes, maybe load a couple of last minute items, and hit the road. That evening routine includes:
-Check the tire presssure
-Layout the bike clothes
-Figure out what I'm wearing the next day (unless I've previously dropped stuff off at work)
-Figure out what I'm eating the next day (pack what I can in the bike bags; put fridge stuff in one place to grab in the morning)

I've always worried that I'll end up at work without proper undergarments, then have to wear a sweaty sports bra all day. Yuck. So undergarments always go in the bike bag the night before, too.

Check, check, check, check. All good Wednesday night. And a good ride Thursday morning, a bit of a tail wind, so I am at the office 6:00 am, ready to shower. In my office, pulling the supplies out of my drawer (towel, shampoo, etc.). From the bike bag, undergarments and,

and,

Uh-oh. No work clothes. I picture my pinstripe blazer and skirt, with the red top, hanging outwards on a hanger in the closet. Still hanging there. So I have to call my hero, Mike to bring in my clothes. Of course it will be a few minutes, because he has to get dressed. Fine, fine, half an hour is good because I can go ahead and jump in the shower; I have a fresh bike top I can put on until he calls that he is at the back door.

Epilogue: when we went to the Farmer's Market today, I took THREE sets of clothes into the office!

Parkinson's Disease

Here is a link to an NPR story on Parkinson's, from a son's perspective.

www.npr.org/2011/06/18/137235480/dad-refuses-to-pass-down-inheritance-of-illness

I thought it did a good job of explaining how Parkinson's Disease (PD) is about so much more than tremors.

Politics again

So maybe this is lazy blogging, but here's another taste of our local politics, copies from our local paper www.columbian.com/weblogs/local-politics/2011/may/06/the-gift-of-gab/:

During Wednesday's work session on increasing the 911 tax, the men in the room far outnumbered the women. In addition to the all-male roster of county commissioners, county administrator and director of the Clark Regional Emergency Services Agency, there were male representatives from fire districts and other emergency response agencies.
And it was the men who had the biggest reaction to a comment by Commissioner Tom Mielke.
CRESA Director Tom Griffith was telling commissioners why 911 dispatchers can't take on additional work, which would be necessary if commissioners didn't increase the monthly excise tax from 50 cents to 70 cents. Ten dispatchers would be laid off, Griffith said.
Griffith was describing how he marvels at how fluidly dispatchers switch between conversations, as a dispatcher is often carrying on two conversations at once. A dispatcher might be relaying information to a police officer while also taking a call from a citizen who is reporting a crime or calling for medical help, for example.
It's difficult to keep all the facts straight, Griffith said.
"Isn't that the reason we have women to do that work?" Mielke asked.
Well, that stopped the discussion.
Commissioner Marc Boldt looked at me writing in my notebook and said, "That wasn't me who said that."
The rumblings in the room prompted Mielke to add, "That's a compliment, by the way."

County politics

Sorry, more politics. Our county intranet has a new spot on the county "reconfiguration," and it mentioned a new county mission statement (which we had never heard of, tho' supposedly adopted last year). Here it is. Ready? There's more, but this is just the intro:

• Mission and Values In 2010, the Board of Clark County Commissioners adopted the following mission statement:‘To better serve the will of citizens,’ or ‘…the will of the people’


• Explanation of Mission Statement The mission statement stems from the first words of US constitution’s mission statement, “We the people…” This is very different than the “We the elite…” wording implicit in so many other founding documents of the past.

Weather

Ooh, ooh, I haven't posted in over two months (except in my new blog: http://reportergaffes.blogspot.com). So quick make something up. We've only been back from vacation 10 days, so how have ya'll put up with this gray drizzle for most of the last 8 weeks? Nasty.

More politics

I probably shouldn't post this. I never intended my blog to become a political post, but c'est la vie. This morning's local paper had a story from our county business that I somehow didn't hear about this week. And it seems these comments should have run through the building like a fire storm. Does that mean we're becoming numb to idiocracy? After I read this story to hubby even he (a Republican) said "some Republicans have gone off a cliff."

The link is below; here's a taste:

[County Commissioner] Mielke said his parents took care of him, and he takes care of his family. He said homeless teenagers are "children who don’t want to abide by the rules of the house so they run away."

www.columbian.com/weblogs/local-politics/2011/jan/19/mielke-were-not-china-not-yet/

Horrific and Lucky

My cousin Rhochelle posted this information on Facebook. See the red VW in the middle of chaos? That is her daughter Lisa's car.

The two of them were at a stop when a SUV ran the red, crashed into another SUV or truck making a turn, and flew OVER their VW. The motorcycle rider was not killed, but three people in the SUV's were. Many other vehicles involved that don't show in this picture.

Contradictions: observations from a government employee

The elections are over, which just means the next ones are starting. Sigh. But during the lull, I have a few observations to make on regular citizens, and their thoughts about "the government."
My career in public service is at 27 years. Curiously, some citizens seem to spew more vitriol as time passes, although agencies have (I think) become more responsive to requests and even more proactive in citizen outreach. Anyhow, I won't cover 27 years of thoughts here, just recent contradictions:

Overall, some citizens want less government except when they want more.
a. National example: we should let businesses alone, and they will always do the right thing. Then during the BP oil spill, folks wanted to know why the government wasn't doing more.
b. State example (applies to both Oregon and Washington): we should cut our property taxes, and government will have to figure out how to spend less. Then people expect the state to fully support/fund the schools. And roads. And parks. And police/courts/jails. And mental health services.
c. Local example: public employees are overpaid so we should let private businesses do the work. Then when the City of Vancouver extends a contract for a business to operate the wastewater treatment plants, the newspaper readers comment, "We can't Hire/Train local people to do the same job for less than that?"

I previously blogged about voters who went for all the "R"s on the ticket. And that's their choice, but disregarding that the incumbent, non-R, Clerk of the Court (different from county clerks in Oregon) had been with the court systems over 30 years, and the challenger -- the R -- was a purchasing agent for a drywall company. So the voters were willing to "hire," that is vote for, someone and pay them $90,000 a year. Hire someone with no training or education in the position. Seriously.

Oh, and speaking of "overpaid public servants" let's talk retirement. The whole retirement conversation is very complicated, which makes it hard to have a conversation. And every jurisdiction is different, so we don't have the same problems as say New Jersey. Basically for Oregon, when I started in 1983, the design was equivalent to a private company plan (is that a 401(k)?) where the employee contributes 6% and the employer matches 6%. If you do the math on that over 30 years with interest, you can end up with enough to get half of your final salary for the rest of your life. (Really. If you start at say $20,000 per year salary and end at $40,000, and the interest earns on average 8%, your balance after 30 years will let you take out $2,000 per month for 37 years.) But tiny miscues on the design or execution of the plan can compound into large problems over time if not fixed immediately. One problem on the design was that employees could risk a higher portion of their contribution on the stock market, but the employer/agency share couldn't go there, so those years of 20% stock market returns meant the employer/agency couldn't make the matching share. The (reasonable) plan design never dreamed that we would have five years in a row with 20% returns! HUGE problem not really because of the design but because of unimaginable world financial markets. And when I do retire I do NOT get free paid health insurance. I will have access to buy it at market rates, which I think is about $800 or more per month.

There's more, but I've vented so I am okay for a little longer. Two divergent thoughts here -- thanks for your patience.