Bill: Weds. Jan. 8, Six Months

Six months.

SIX months.

What have I learned? Gosh, where to start.  Although I am not in the medical field, I was lucky to have taken advantage of first aid training in my prior jobs, AND read information in our weekly employee newsletter during "heart month" on recognizing strokes.  Bill delayed Ayn a little bit in calling for help, because he only knew he felt funny. As Ayn saw him deteriorate, she convinced him to let her call me.

Why did I even ask the stroke questions? Was it because I've asked my husband before, and it's my only tool in the toolbox? Regardless of Ayn's answers - Bill's answers - I would have said to call 9-1-1 to have paramedics check him out, and they wouldn't transport him if they didn't think it was necessary.

I have also become very close to my daughter-in-law. She is so dedicated to Bill and his recovery. By staying at his side this ENTIRE time, she has been able to point out issues early on and advocate on his behalf.  Examples: the sedative propofol would be turned off 10 minutes before an ICU doctor would test neurological responses, but she observed it took at least 30 minutes for Bill to come around.  Or a nurse or CNA who was chatty-chatty on the graveyard shift, depriving him of much needed rest, and reducing the effectiveness of the next day's therapy.  On the positive side, she noted which therapists had the best results with him, and asked to be booked with those individuals as much as possible (hello, Meadow! Yes, her real name.)  And Ayn was much kinder about it, not wanting to ruffle feathers, where I nearly yelled, "Who WAS that woman" on a new, over-perfumed, meandering therapist.

So I've learned from Ayn that advocacy doesn't have to be delivered with a stick. Um, I gotta admit I'm still working on implementing the lesson, especially when I'm tired, which is most of the time, um, but, yeah...

Power of Positive. I know when I shared the July Nine Hour Trip To Hell Failed Transfer, the details upset a lot of people. Perhaps I needed to vent, perhaps I needed to document. Then I had to let it go (after filing a complaint with state regulators).  From the event, we learned we had to visit a place before Bill would be transferred. We still aren't sure what our rights are when medical care is not being provided in a medical facility - and your loved one can't get up and walk out to a different facility. MOSTLY I learned the importance of moving on, creating good karma, welcoming each person's gift of good thoughts whether it is in the form of prayers, wishes, or the very generous "what can I do for you?" So thank all of you, once again, for your positive thoughts.